5 Practical Tips For Working Moms
Moms are master multitaskers. We wear 100 hats and are constantly balancing the mental, physical and emotional load of caring for households and small babies. All moms have a lot on their plate, whether they are home full time, or working full time, or a combination of both. Regardless of what our day to day looks like, we need to support each other, because it ain’t easy!
I have been reflecting a lot recently about what makes balancing work and motherhood so taxing. For each of us, it's probably a little bit different. I find that the transition from work-mode to mom-mode is particularly hard for me and for a lot of moms. The constant switching of hats can feel relentless. However, I notice that the days I am able to exercise more mindfulness and intentionality in that transition, the more I am able to enjoy the time with my kids.
Going from the demands of work to then the emotional demands of mothering, is difficult to do seamlessly. Here are some things that have helped:
Give uninterrupted time to your kids before starting a task:
As a working mom, I know how overwhelming it can be to get home after a long day and immediately take in all that is out of order, and all that needs to get done. It is easy to get sucked in and to just start cleaning up or getting things ready for the next day.
However, I have noticed that if I am able to give my kids my full undivided attention for 20-30 minutes, it meets their need for connection and they are more likely to not interrupt as much while I try to get necessary things done. The days I am able to remember this, make the rest of the afternoon go much more smoothly.
Remember, even “negative” behavior are bids for connection, so give them that first before they even have a chance to ask you for it. Their interruptions are simply bids to connect.
I know for me, something I grapple with the most is being interrupted a million times while trying to complete one simple task, and usually not an enjoyable one… like, loading and unloading the dishwasher. The amount of times I have to stop and soothe a crying baby, or answer one of my toddles 100 questions, or help my husband find something (lol), but really.
It’s beyond frustrating and an annoying task now becomes almost impossible to complete in a normal amount of time. If I expect to be interrupted, however, I notice that I am much more calm and patient in the way I respond. As opposed to having the expectation that I can complete the task without anyone needing something.
Schedule self care breaks frequently:
“You can’t pour from an empty cup. This is my motherhood mantra.”
As moms, we are constantly giving and giving. If you’re a working mom, you are giving of yourself all day at work, and in the afternoon, your second full time job begins. Please make time for yourself, and for the you that exists outside of being a mom or a professional. I promise that if you pay attention to her, and meet her needs, she will be a better wife, mother, and employee. Prioritize her.
Have a ritual that allows you to leave work at work:
Be intentional about exiting work mode. In between work and home, give yourself time to adjust. This is a big one. Having that separation is so important.
Whether it’s taking an extra few minutes in the car and giving yourself time to unwind, or having a calming ritual on your drive home (feel good podcast, chat with an uplifting friend) or physically shutting off communication from work when you get in the car. Whatever it looks like for you, make a conscious effort to make a distinction between work and home, and give yourself a moment to make the adjustment. Even an extra few minutes to sit in peace can help you prepare for the next part of your day.
Check your self talk:
Don’t forget to be kind to yourself. If on the way home you are telling yourself things like “I'm too tired to deal with this” (been there) or “I don’t have any patience left to handle anything else today” (been there), then that is how you will show up.
On the contrary, if you tell yourself that you’ve got this, that you’re doing your best, and that you are capable, then that’s how you’re going to show up. The way we talk to ourselves matters.
If you’re struggling with motherhood as a stay at home mom or working mom or both, I’m here for you. I’d be happy to chat with you to discuss how I can help you find the balance you’re looking for. Give me a call for your complimentary consultation at 954-391-5305 today.
I offer counseling in our beautiful office located in Plantation Florida and online via our secure telehealth platform for those who live in Florida. For more information about myself and my approach to therapy, click here.
I look forward to speaking with you soon!