Search Results

The anxious mind will have you believing things about yourself, your circumstances, and your future that are just not true. Anxiety lies. Plain and simple. Once you can acknowledge that your mind plays tricks, you’ll be able to get back in the driver’s seat and regain a sense of control of yourself and your life. Let’s take a look at some of the most common lies that your anxiety will try to convince you of… 1. Worrying about the future is an effective method of problem-solving. Endless worrying is NOT helping you! You might try to justify your worry by telling yourself that this is how you avoid surprises in the future, but let’s be real for a second… worrying about situations that have not occurred yet doesn’t necessarily prevent anything from happening. In fact, it just becomes a major hindrance to your ability to be your best in the present moment because it creates more opportunities to beat yourself up and perpetuate fears. Worrying boils down to a need to feel in control. That makes you feel safe and there’s nothing wrong with that. However, you have to accept that you cannot control everything. Once you can come to terms with that, you can develop a healthy sense of control and do a better job of managing those parts of your life and experiences that you have a real influence on. 2. You should fear everybody sensation you get. Those of you with health-related anxiety struggle with this one the most. Every flutter, tingle, and twinge triggers a reaction for you that often throws you into an anxiety attack or even a panic attack. Our bodies are made of complex systems that are constantly operating to keep us going. Sometimes we feel things, but that doesn’t always mean that something is wrong with us. If you’re a person that has a fear of death; maybe because you’ve witnessed others suddenly pass on or have experienced medical issues that were traumatic for you; you might have become overly aware of bodily sensations. This hyper-awareness could be fueling your anxiety and causing you to believe that there is a problem where there isn’t one. 3. You’re weak. Anxiety is rooted in fear and as such has little faith in your abilities most of the time. It will cause you to feel incapable in many different ways. This is a bald-faced lie! It’s one of the most debilitating lies because it makes you feel shitty about yourself AND interferes with your ability to ask for help from others in fear of their judgment or perception of you. You might feel like a burden on others to ask for support or be concerned that if they know you need help that they may view you as incompetent or defective. By dispelling this belief you can build your confidence and become more aware of your strength. 4. You’re not safe. A feeling that you are not safe is the essence of anxiety. It all starts with your amygdala, the most primitive part of your brain. Its job is to initiate the fight-flight-freeze-fawn response in your body. While its motive is simply to ensure your survival, those of you with anxiety have an overactive amygdala. It's the ability to recognize true danger is all out of whack. When you live with heightened anxiety, your brain is perceiving threats EVERYWHERE and this will steer you away from a lot of things in life. You may avoid social gatherings, job opportunities, conversations, and new adventures because they all feel unsafe to you. But living in isolation out of fear is NOT benefiting you either. You can retrain this part of your brain to recognize real danger and learn to create safety for yourself. 5. You’re going to be stuck like this forever. That’s a terrifying thought… forever is a long time! Feeling stuck is one of the most common reasons folks find their way to my therapy office. When we feel stuck we start to question everything... what’s my purpose, where am I going in life, have I made the wrong decisions for myself? These kinds of questions for an anxious person can cause you to feel completely trapped. Being stuck comes with feeling hopeless a lot of the time, so I encourage you to change your language. Let’s use the word immobilized instead. This means you’ve stopped moving, and there are loads of factors that cause us to slow down or stop. By bringing awareness to those factors we can develop strategies to get the wheels moving again. Just because the vehicle has stopped doesn’t mean it’s broken down never to move again. How to Overcome The Lies Anxiety Tells You 1. Ground Yourself and Observe As a person with anxiety, you know that sometimes you feel unable to move but other times you have so much energy that you just want to jump out of your skin. A good way to get grounded is to get out that excess energy first. Do a bunch of jumping jacks, vigorously shake your body, arms, and legs, or go up and down your stairs for a couple of minutes. Once you’ve expended the extra juice, find a comfortable place to sit down. Allow gravity to pull your weight down and focus on how it feels to be completely supported by whatever surface you are sitting on. Relax your arms and legs. Relax your face by releasing any tension in your forehead, loosening the grip of your jaw, and dropping your tongue from the roof of your mouth. Now just focus on your breaths. Inhale and exhale. That is the only objective until you feel settled and still. Once you’re grounded in that space, the next step is to begin to observe your thoughts. Imagine yourself as an outsider watching your thoughts flow through your mind on a film reel or slideshow. They come in just as easily as they move back out. Don’t worry about giving any thought that much attention, we’ll get there soon. Spend some time getting comfortable here before you move on. Be patient with yourself, it might take a little time. 2. Challenge Distorted Thoughts Now that you’ve successfully distanced yourself from engaging every thought that comes through your mind, you’re ready to acknowledge and work through any distorted thoughts and information contributing to your anxiety. It can help to write your thoughts on paper as you go to get them out of your head so you can see them clearly. There are several ways that our brains distort information; these are called cognitive distortions. Some of the most frequent cognitive distortions associated with anxiety are polarized thinking (also known as dichotomous thinking), catastrophizing, personalization, and filtering. Polarized thinking will have you believe that there are only two outcomes; one is right and the other is wrong, one is good and the other is bad; it can also be an all or nothing scenario. Many life circumstances don’t benefit from this kind of thinking. If you’re locked into polarized thinking, try to find the middle ground. Find the grey between the black and white. Catastrophizing is exactly what it sounds like, jumping to the worst-case scenario. This kind of thinking really throws you into anxiety and panic. It’s hard to stop yourself from doing this, so instead acknowledge when you’re doing it, bring yourself back to the present moment, and focus on the facts of the situation. Remember you can’t control everything and worry about things outside of your control is not going to help you. Personalization is essentially taking everything personally. Sometimes when you’re anxious you might find that you are assuming every other person’s negative attitude or action is because of something you did or said. That’s not true. The best way to challenge these kinds of thoughts is to avoid jumping to conclusions and recognize that there are a lot of other reasons someone may be in a bad mood or acting differently that may have absolutely nothing to do with you. Filtering happens when you “filter” out all of the positive events, outcomes, or information and focus solely on the negative. Coupled with catastrophizing, this way of thinking becomes really problematic because you are limiting your perspective and not seeing the full picture. Take a minute to check in with yourself and review ALL of the facts. 3. Practice Self-Compassion and Move Forward with a Clear Lens The final step is to reflect on your analysis of your thought patterns to form your opinions or make decisions with a clear perspective. Challenging distorted thinking can be difficult, but once you do you can offer yourself compassion and move forward. Separate from your anxious mind, acknowledge your worth, and offer acceptance to yourself. Now is the time to shift your focus to self-care. Ask yourself “What do I need right now? How can I show myself some love today?” You are not your anxiety and you CAN overcome it. And the best part is you don’t have to get through it alone. Let me (Nicole Ambrose, LCSW) support you through this process. Give me a call for a complimentary consultation at 954-391-5305. Together we will strengthen your mental and emotional muscles to increase your confidence in your ability to manage whatever life throws your way. If you want to learn more about how to overcome an anxiety attack click here and if you want tips for how to go from anxiety to peace, click here.

The importance of Prenatal care is well known, but what isn’t as commonly known or accepted is the importance of postpartum care. The necessity of medical care for both mom and baby does not end with birth; It should continue into the fourth semester. The “fourth trimester” is critical to the overall health of new mothers and babies. The fourth trimester is considered the first 6 weeks after giving birth but can last much longer than that. This continuum of care often goes unnoticed and not discussed with medical providers due to feelings of shame and fear of being labeled a “bad mother”. However, emphasis should be placed on the importance of postpartum care just as it is for creating a plan for prenatal care. New moms, parents, and families need to create a plan for postpartum support to ensure the health of both mom and baby. The postpartum stage, or “fourth trimester” generally refers to the first 6 weeks after childbirth and can extend as far as 4-6 months due to physical and emotional issues or complications. However, I believe this stage can last up to one year after the birth of a baby. Not only is each mom different and an individual, but moms can also feel different after each baby. Becoming a new mother for the first time or even the fifth time is a period of tremendous change and responsibility making it a particularly vulnerable space for both mothers and babies. Because of this, it is imperative for mom to obtain postpartum support during this time. Postpartum support refers to the physical, emotional, and mental treatment available that can protect the relationship between both the new mother and the baby, as well as the relationship with herself and others. One of the keys to success after giving birth is to create a strong postpartum support network. This is especially important for high-risk mothers and babies. Think of your network like family, friends, and health care professionals you can depend on and who you could ask for help. Here are some of the benefits of creating a postpartum support network: 1. New motherhood is a challenging time. You as a new mom or a mom for the 5th time, involve your body moving through changes both emotionally and physically. You are also learning how to deal with all the changes of being a mother or adding to your family. This process involves you and your partner learning how to care for your newborn and function as a family unit. It’s definitely a challenging time to think about self-care, let alone make time for it. A “village of support” can offer the support and resources you need. 2. What does postpartum support look like? Your postpartum support network starts with your OB/GYN team. This could also be a midwife, a postpartum doula, lactation consultant, nutritionist, pelvic floor therapist, and/or massage therapist. However, safe and effective care during the postpartum period consists of many different components to include both internal and external care. External care can include dealing with the change in body shape after giving birth, monitoring the body or scars from a c-section to ensure proper healing, managing possible hair loss (which is totally common), and resolving issues associated with breastfeeding. Internal care includes aspects of recovery that are not clearly visible on the outside and oftentimes stigmafied such as physical fatigue, body aches, cramps, pain, and constipation. Internal care can help to lessen or alleviate these symptoms while simultaneously monitoring for any health complications. The emotional and mental components of postpartum care require seeking assistance or help and no mom should feel guilt, shame, or fear for doing so. At home, your support system can be your partner, family, friends, really anyone with whom you feel comfortable, especially when you are not feeling your best. 3. Your postpartum support network can be an extra set of eyes and ears. Family, friends, and medical professionals are often the first to recognize when a mom is struggling or is not her normal self. After giving birth, your body has just undergone a strenuous ordeal that will require both physical and mental recovery periods. There are many hormonal fluctuations throughout this time, which can lead to further complications. Anxiety, low confidence, self-esteem issues, and postpartum depression are all incredibly common experiences for new and experienced mothers. Obtaining appropriate mental health services can help to deal with these issues. This includes attending a support group such as a new mother group, postpartum self-help group, or postpartum therapy groups, seeking out individual counseling from a mental health professional specializing in maternal mental health, or asking for and relying on the assistance of those close around you. All new mothers as well as experienced mothers need a baseline of support to include sleep, healthy food, self-confidence, and time for themselves. Every woman’s postpartum needs will be different; some only need a few people to lean on for assurance and others need a village. Either way, it is okay to ask for help. It is important to have a postpartum support plan in place before your baby is born. If you need help with this, please first reach out to your OB/GYN, but know there are more resources available to you. I can assist you in creating a postpartum plan that is right for you, and that will give you the resources and tools to help you be a happy, healthy mom with a happy, healthy baby. I offer counseling for women along with their pregnancy and postpartum journey. Please do not hesitate to speak up. Your “village” is here to help you. I am here for you. If you’re ready to move forward with counseling, give me a call for your free consultation at 954-391-5305.

Ah, Love! It’s the most beautiful feeling in the world! You meet, fall in love and now you can’t imagine your life without this other person! Maybe, by now you have a family, are planning a wedding, share assets, friends, and a whole world where everything in your lives are intertwined. But over time, you begin to notice cracks in the foundation of that love and feel terrified of losing this beautiful thing that you created with this person. You say to yourself “Oh, it’s not that bad” or “this will pass” or “I guess I can deal with this need not being met.” But then things continue to spiral into negativity. This isn’t passing; it does feel that bad, core needs go unmet and resentment follows. Then you say what you never imagined you’d say when in the beginning stages of this blossoming love; “I think we need to talk to someone”. Couples therapy can feel daunting. Not only are people concerned and scared for their relationship, but now they have to open up and confide in a complete stranger about some of the most intimate areas of their lives. This is a sentiment I completely understand and I make it a point to validate this feeling for all of my clients. People have different ideas and concerns about what it means to go to couples therapy. People often worry about what the therapist will think, who will the therapist side with? Another common question is “Is our relationship too far gone?” Often, couples feel concerned over what they will discover in couples therapy which dissuades people from participating at all. Due to peoples’ fears or anxieties, many couples avoid couples counseling or marriage therapy leading problems to fester and get worse over time. According to John Gottman, couples wait an average of 6 years before going to couples therapy. Unfortunately, this often sets up the relationship and any attempt of relationship recovery for failure. Couples therapy is not for everyone and those parameters should be set by the therapist at the onset of the therapeutic process. Couples therapy is not for those who are in physically abusive relationships or who are continuing an extramarital affair with the refusal to let go of the affair partner. Additionally, it’s not a platform to yell and scream at one another while the therapist acts like a referee, picking a winner at the end. Couples therapy is not a place to hurt or to deliberately emotionally wound one another. Let’s talk about what to actually expect from couples therapy... You should expect a therapist who aligns with both partners in a couple and seeks to uncover each individual’s unique truth and perspective, helping those truths emerge in a way that each partner understands. The therapist should help each partner feel comfortable and work to understand the perceptions involved in problems that arise. Couples therapy is an opportunity to grow and evolve with an unbiased third party to facilitate discussions. Couples therapy is an emotionally safe space to explore interactional sequences to determine what plays a role in negative and positive outcomes. Couples therapy is a platform to practice a variety of skills related to enhancing friendship, respect, communication, conflict management, and generating solutions for barriers to having a healthier relationship. In couple’s therapy, unproductive behavioral cycles are disrupted and people learn how to listen and speak in ways that lead to productive and brighter outcomes. Whatever brings a couple into couple’s therapy, the most important thing is that there are 2 people who are motivated and willing to repair the relationship. One must look inwards in how their behavior plays a role in relationship challenges. The key ingredient is successful couples therapy is love. With love, motivation, accountability, and a willingness to make positive change, couples therapy can be an invaluable experience. If you and/or your partner are considering couples therapy or marriage counseling, it’s important to find a therapist who is a relationship expert (someone who is specifically trained to work with couples since relationships are complex systems). For more information about the couples therapists and marriage counselors at our Bayview Therapy Coral Springs or Fort Lauderdale, Florida offices, click here. Call today at 954-391-5305 for your complimentary consultation. Cheers to healthy and happy relationships!

Most parents request individual counseling for their child when their child is struggling in some way. It could be behavioral issues, anxiety, failing grades, anger, etc. Many times parents are not aware that family counseling is also an option. A Family therapist looks at the whole family system instead of just the “identified client”. They look to see if there is something in the family system that may be contributing and/or causing the child's behavioral symptoms. Any system, whether it be a corporation, school, or organization will not function as well as it could if any part of the system is not working efficiently. If one part is broken the whole system is affected. This is also true with family systems. If the system is broken in some way then the members of the family (children) will begin to act out that dysfunction. A well-trained Family Therapist can identify what needs to be adjusted to create a healthy, functioning system that leads to harmony and peace within the family. Let’s give an example: A child is brought to therapy for anxiety and/or behavioral issues. The child's parents also fight and argue on a daily basis. If the child is being seen individually, the therapist will not have the opportunity to address the cause of the child's symptoms. In family therapy, the therapist can identify the issue between the parents, help to correct it, and get to the root cause of the child's anxiety and/or behavior issues. How Family Therapy Creates A Healthy Family System Structure: All systems need someone at the top to guide them effectively. Family systems need to be guided and directed by the parents and/or parents. Having all family members clearly understand the importance of this is critical. Healthy Communication: All family members are spoken to with respect and courtesy. This has a significant impact on how the family interacts and treats each other. Individual Choices: Parents explain to their children what is acceptable behavior and what isn't. The children understand that if they make a choice to do what they know is unacceptable then there is a consequence. Clear Boundaries and Consequences: It is important that there are clear consequences when boundaries are broken. Parents need to be consistent with this. Parents Parenting Together: Children need to see, and know, that their parents are united in guiding and directing them. This gives children a sense of inner security and confidence that they are being guided and taken care of as they go about their daily lives. Expressing Feelings: Family therapy will help all family members to verbally express their feelings of anger, sadness, fear, disappointment, etc... instead of holding the feelings in or expressing them in an unhealthy way. Creating A Safe Environment: All family members will know that it is ok and safe to communicate their thoughts and feelings without being judged or fear of any kind of negative reaction. Family therapy can have many, many benefits for those who seek it. I encourage you to consider family therapy at either of our offices in Coral Springs or Fort Lauderdale, Florida if you are experiencing any type of issue or unhappiness in your family. About David Schlagter, LCSW I graduated from Syracuse University in 1995 with a Masters in Social Work and a concentration in Family Systems Theory. Years later, I had the rare experience of being selected to receive training and supervision from one of the original founders of Family Therapy, Dr. Salvador Manuchin. During my time of professional practice, I have had the pleasure and privilege of helping countless families to create a truly healthy and loving family. Please feel free to contact me at 954-391-5305 if you have any questions or would like to schedule an appointment for Family Counseling in Coral Springs or Parkland, Florida. For more information about my approach to counseling, click here.

What if I told you that DBT had me come full circle in my approach to practice as a therapist? I first learned about Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, DBT, in my final year of graduate school in a transpersonal psychology program, where I wanted to approach psychology from the soulful, the unknown, the mysterious, and the beyond. DBT was one segment of our Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) course. I appreciated and valued the science of psychology, but had a knee-jerk opposition to a strict focus on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) to heal clients. Somehow CBT seemed too superficial, too measured, and too demanding as a healing practice. As a former lawyer, I was tired of the uber-rational, the rules, and the norms. I favored approaching therapy, as healing, and as more art than science. I have since come to see that DBT integrates both art and science, the rational and the emotional, the body and the mind, the many and the One. It is a constant search for both/and, not either/or solutions to dilemmas, and how we view and respond to problems. So enamored in its approach was I that I became trained in its skills and foundations and have the privilege of offering DBT to the teens, adults, and couples that I work with. What DBT Therapy Is All About DBT is a mix of CBT, behaviorism, and mindful practices, recognizing the importance of both the rational and the emotional realms of life. DBT seeks a middle path, inviting us to use our “Wise Mind” as the north star when engaging with each other and the world. DBT was developed by Marsha Linehan, Ph.D., an accomplished psychologist, researcher, and transformational leader. Stories of Linehan’s wit, skill, and tenacity abound. I invite you to pick up a copy of her Cognitive- Behavioral Treatment of Borderline Personality Disorder (1993) to see how both she and DBT evolved in the field. Dialectics From the point of view of dialogue and relationship, Linehan described the dialectics in DBT as: “… change by persuasion and by making use of the oppositions inherent in the therapeutic relationship, rather than by formal impersonal logic.” Given that many among the population most served with DBT have been subject to severe trauma, DBT starts with whatever challenges the client presents with, and seeks to find new meanings within old frameworks, creating synthesis from thesis and antithesis. In DBT, the therapist utilizes contrasting skills -- sometimes coaching, sometimes the devil’s advocate position, and sometimes radical acceptance. Clinicians understand trauma and that all of us are capable of extremes. Therapists accompany clients as they learn to manage uproars and soothe other difficult feelings that can emerge suddenly, or out of the blue. DBT shows clients that change takes something. It’s rarely a cup of tea. Sometimes you have to do the exact opposite of what your strongest urge wants to do. DBT assumes the client is capable, not fragile, and fully capable of change; but also assumes that, until awareness and skills are practiced and internalized, failures can occur. DBT skills are taught to ensure clients don’t make a bad situation worse. Clients discover that, even if they didn’t cause their intolerable circumstances, they have to live with them. They can try to solve their problems, look at them differently, radically accept them as they are, or stay miserable. Emotional Regulation, Distress Tolerance, & Interpersonal Effectiveness DBT works well for those who rampage or fly out of control, with words, deeds, substance use; and emotions; and for those who zoom from a 3 to 4 to a 9 or 10 on the overwhelm/outrage scale, in a split second, and stay there longer than is effective. Clients seeking DBT may find themselves in constant challenges with others, their finances, their health, their safety, their stability, their careers, school, relationships, and resources. They may find they suffer so much loss, they inhibit grieving, moving from one relentless crisis to another. While DBT validates that trauma, when untreated, may create chronic states of emotional dysregulation, and that such states may lead to impulsive, dangerous, and ineffective behaviors, it pulls for strength and resilience. It attempts to make lemonade out of lemons. Biology and Behaviorism DBT helps clients, partners, and parents shape new behaviors, extinguish ineffective ones, and discern what may be keeping troubling interactions in place. DBT clients benefit from the treatment focus on educating clients and families about the biology of trauma and dysregulation, nature, function, and urges of emotions, and the vital need for validation and soothing in our lives. DBT Skills DBT Skills comprise four modules: Mindfulness, Interpersonal Effectiveness, Emotional Regulation, and Distress Tolerance. Skills are often taught in groups of 3 or more participants. Each module is covered in approximately 6-8 weeks, with a course of DBT-adherent therapy typically running a course of six months or more. Skills are trained in simple, elegant, and practical ways. They have catchy acronyms that come in handy when you need one in a snap (like when your emotional engine is running way too hot and you are heading into a meeting). Homework and group participation reinforce skills training, and inter-session coaching offers opportunities to keep clients on track. I like DBT, because it is humane, practical, reinforcing, and effective. For the most seriously challenged clients, DBT research finds that DBT reduces episodes of suicidality and self-harm, hospitalization stays, and dropouts from therapy. Client testimonials further attest to its efficacy, and nothing beats seeing results on the ground. Who is DBT Most Effective With? DBT Treatment is not only for suicidal or deeply traumatized individuals and has multiple stages of treatment, ranging from the most life-threatening (stage 1) to what seems to me to be the most existential/spiritual (stage 4). DBT Adherent treatment typically involves a comprehensive packet of services including personal therapy, DBT Skills Training, Phone Coaching, and DBT Consultation for the Therapist. DBT therapists may use the DBT Skills book and diary cards to reinforce principles and measure progress/regression. Diary cards also provide an efficient way for the therapist to gain a birds-eye view of the client’s life between sessions. The interest in DBT seems to be growing. In fact, MSNBC’s Morning Joe recently aired an interview with two prominent DBT experts touting their new DBT for Dummies book. A link to the segment can be found here. Hopefully, this whets your appetite to hear more about DBT. For questions as to how DBT might serve you or someone you love, please call Carla Barrow, LMFT at 954-391-5305 for a complimentary consultation in English or Spanish. And keep your eyes out for future articles on how I use DBT to enhance Couples Therapy.

The Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer, Questioning, Intersexed, Asexual (LGBTQIA*) community represents a diverse range and umbrella of identities and expression of gender and sexual orientation. Members of the LGBTQIA+ community are diverse in many ways such as race, ethnicity, nationality, religion, and class. There are so many overlapping aspects of an individual’s identity, which bring unique perspective and value to the therapeutic relationship. Many of the LGBTQIA+ community are marginalized and face prejudice, discrimination, denial of human rights, harassment, and trauma. Many are not accepted not only by society at large but are not accepted and may be disowned by their family and loved ones. Many struggles with shame and experience a fractured relationship with their higher power which ultimately impacts mental health. Worsened mental health symptoms typically occur to other marginalized groups of people within this community, particularly people of color and/or low socioeconomic status. Risk to the LGBTQIA+ Community While being a member of the LGBTQIA+ community is something we sometimes see associated with pride parades and pride campaigns, it is not always something we and others feel is worth celebrating. It brings many unique challenges to mental health. LGB adults are twice as likely as heterosexual adults to experience a mental health condition. Furthermore, our trans youth are twice as likely to experience depressive symptoms, seriously consider suicide, and attempt suicide compared to cisgender lesbian, gay, bisexual, queer, and questioning youth. How Do I Find an affirming LGBTQIA+ Therapist? Finding an affirming therapist to fit your needs is one of the most important steps to finding effective therapy. Oftentimes we are the most honest, willing, and ready to heal when in an environment where we feel safe, heard, and understood. It’s hard, to be honest, and let your guard down when you don’t feel comfortable! Especially when running the risk of prejudice and discrimination with professionals is unfortunately rather high. Despite protections that have been put into place, the LGBTQIA+ community faces high rates of harassment, humiliation, and refusal of services from varying medical practitioners. In fact, research shows, up to 19% of people report avoiding healthcare and are discouraged from seeking the help that they need. How to Choose the Right Therapist? Important questions to ask are: is it important to me to find a therapist who identifies similarly to me? Or rather, is it important to find a therapist who is simply a member of the LGBTQIA+ community? Lastly, is it okay if my therapist is an ally and does not identify as being within the community? Is it important for my therapist to have specialized training? If you are transgender and are seeking a mental health professional to write a letter of support for gender-affirming medical care or for legal documentation change, you should seek a provider who understands the insurance or legal requirements of support letters. This you can discuss with your insurance provider directly or can search google directly for something like “therapists for gender-affirming letters.” Additionally, you can click here to view a website filled with providers who do so for free or for a low cost. Finding the Right Therapist for Me Depending on the therapist, you may be able to find information indicating their identity on their profile or website. Some therapists may feel willing to disclose their identity, while others do not. If you are on the website to a group practice, such as Bayview Therapy, it is great to toggle through the services offered and check to see that there is content on the website inclusive of YOUR identity (ie: LGBTQIA+ Counseling). Look to see if you feel comfortable among what has been written and continue to form your decision from there. Many insurance providers will have directories to skim through or will offer numbers of providers who list LGBTQIA+ competency. If you are comfortable, there are also many resources within the community. Wilton Manors is a well-known town in South Florida (near our Bayview Therapy Fort Lauderdale office) and often referred to as the “Second Gayest City” or the “Gayborhood.” There are local places such as Sunserve and the community center Compass. The final key to finding the “right” therapist for you is to take the plunge and make the call. Ask questions that are important to you (perhaps some of the questions I mentioned above) in making sure your therapist has the experience or training you are looking for. Don’t settle for someone you don’t feel that “connection” with. Remember, finding the right match is key to finding effective therapy. What to Expect in Therapy? Lastly, what do I expect when I go to therapy? This answer looks different for everyone. Once finding the right therapist, you can discuss any concerns you have, whether they are specific to your gender identity/sexual orientation or not. LGBTQIA+ counseling can help with exploration of identity/sexuality, working through trauma, discussing acceptance, exploration, coming out, gender dysphoria, processing discrimination, sexual issues, addiction, parenting issues, relationship issues, and managing mental health. Many LGBTQIA+ individuals ready to enter therapy aren’t looking for therapy centered around their identity, but rather, just want to know the person they’re working with accepts them. Any topics can be discussed such as low self-esteem, anxiety, depression, stress, life transitions, etc. If you would like to learn more about me (Alex Steiner, LCSW) and my approach, please visit my bio here. If any of the information above resonates with you and you feel ready to begin your therapy journey, please reach out and give me a call today at 954-391-5305. I offer free 15-minute consultations, so we can make sure I am the right match for you. I look forward to hearing from you!

Everybody wants peace. But peace seems so far away, so unobtainable when you're struggling with anxiety. You wonder if you'll ever experience it again. When we have anxiety, we realize just how precious inner peace is. We just want the suffering to end. The truth is, peace is always with us. It is the core of our being. It is the essence of who we are. It just gets covered up with feelings of fear, anger, and sadness. It's like knowing that the sun is there, but we can't see it, feel it, or experience it because dark clouds are covering it up. It is not until the clouds are gone that we can experience the beauty and light of the sun. We want to walk from the darkness of anxiety into the light of peace. What Causes Anxiety? Most people believe that it is something outside of themselves that is causing their anxiety. It is not the person, place, situation, or thing that is causing your anxiety. It is your thoughts about the person, place, situation, or thing that is causing the anxiety. This awareness is critical in beginning to transition from anxiety to peace. At any given moment, we can choose how we see, process, or think about what we are experiencing in our lives. For example, you are scheduled to give a presentation at work. Thoughts of "what if I can't answer all of their questions, what if I forget important points or details, suppose they won't like it..." And the mind keeps going creating one fearful, worrisome thought after another. Is it any wonder we're feeling anxious? Especially, when these thoughts are a constant barrage throughout the day. Here are my tips for how to go from anxiety to peace: We Can Change Our Thoughts We want to learn to change these anxiety-producing thoughts to thoughts that will contribute to inner peace. Such as, "I have prepared the best I can for this presentation. That's all I can do. I'll do the best I can. If they like it, great. If they don't, there is nothing I can do about that. But I do know that I will be ok regardless of what happens." You can feel the difference between the two thoughts immediately. Our feelings are directly related to our thoughts. Stop Feeding The Anxiety Every time we choose to entertain or get involved with anxious thoughts, we strengthen the anxiety. In other words, the more we feed it, the bigger it gets. Each time we choose not to get involved with it, it weakens it. It gets smaller. Stay Mindful Sometimes it seems like we don't have any control of the ongoing onslaught of one thought after another. Worse yet, most of these thoughts are worrisome or fearful thoughts. In addition to learning how to change your thoughts, you can also learn how to have a quiet mind. A quiet mind means no thought, no thought means no anxiety. If you have experienced a high degree of anxiety or even panic attacks, this would seem like the best thing that could happen to you. And it is. This is where true peace is found. This is where you experience the peace that is within you. Simply stated, thinking stops when we give our complete, 100% attention to the present moment. Thoughts can not come in when we do this. If you find yourself thinking then your attention has slipped off the present moment. When you become aware that you are thinking again, you have a choice. You can get involved with the thought again. The same thought that has led to the anxiety you have been tortured by. Or you can return your attention to the present moment. The thought pattern, or loop you have been stuck in begins to dissipate each time you choose to return your attention to the present moment instead of engaging in the anxiety-producing thought. Eventually, you will come to know that the present moment is your safe place, your refuge. What we are talking about here is Mindfulness. It has been around since ancient times. For whatever reason, more and more people are becoming aware of Mindfulness and making it a part of their lives. I strongly encourage you to read and learn about it and incorporate it into your daily life. Moment by moment, step by step, you will be going toward peace and away from anxiety. Exercise Regularly Let us not forget the tremendous value of exercise when it comes to dealing with anxiety. Cardiovascular exercise is one of the best things we can do to combat anxiety. Run, swim, bike, kickbox, etc. Get your heart rate elevated, breath hard, sweat, get your endorphins activated. Do this for a minimum of thirty minutes each day. The more you do the less anxiety you will feel. You don't have time? Get up earlier in the morning. I guarantee you that the time exercising will far outweigh any benefit of any extra sleep you would get. Vigorous exercise in the morning is a great way to start your day and that good feeling will help you face and cope with your daily challenges. Nutrition to Calm Your Mind & Body Your body and mind are already overstimulated from anxiety. You don't want to add more stimulation to it with caffeine, sugar, and processed foods. Remember, the goal is to return to our natural state of being, which is peace. Give your body nutrients that will have a calming effect on your mind and body. Chamomile tea can have a very calming effect as can other herbal teas. Eat a variety of whole foods that include plenty of green vegetables. Eat at least three small meals per day with one or two healthy snacks. Just enough to get you to your next meal. This will keep your blood sugar steady and prevent mood swings. Eating in this way will keep you emotionally, mentally, and physically balanced. A Brief Word About Me I have been teaching and practicing these concepts and tools for many years. It's helpful and beneficial for you to have someone that fully understands the anxiety and how to get you through it. Someone who can keep you on your path to recovery. I can assure you that your life can, and will change when you begin taking the steps to change it. My genuine and sincere interest is in helping those who suffer from anxiety. I know what you are going through and how to help you return to the peaceful, joyous life you deserve. Please feel free to contact me at 954-391-5305 if you have questions or if you would like to schedule an appointment. For more information about my approach to counseling, click here. For more tips on how to manage your anxiety, click here. Here's to living an anxiety-free life!

The “inner critic” is the voice in your head that perpetuates fear and creates a barrier in your relationship with yourself and others. It’s the voice that tears you down when you look in the mirror, causes you to question the motives of others, even those closest to you, and stands in the way of your success and happiness. The inner critic is like an insatiable bully living within you that constantly holds you back or keeps you feeling stuck. It’s the voice that says “you’re ugly… no one likes you… you’re stupid… you’re not worthy of love… you’re incompetent and incapable… you’ll never be good enough.” So why would you ever want to befriend this part of yourself? Well, let’s think for a minute about where this voice came from. This is not something you were born with. No one is birthed thinking that they suck in every way and are destined to be a failure. Your inner critic develops over time, beginning with your earliest experiences in life. It’s fueled by all of the times you’ve encountered or witnessed negative and hurtful attitudes or reactions. Every day your mind absorbs information and files it away to use at a later time to influence your decision-making and actions. However, it’s not terribly good at assessing what information may actually hinder or hurt you in the long run. In fact, the intent is not to hurt you, but to protect you from being hurt in a counterintuitive sort of way. So with that known, you could make the claim that your inner critic is actually a defense system created to help you avoid harm. Whether you like it or not, it’s a part of you so it’s in your best interest to learn these steps. Step 1: Acknowledge and Accept Many self-help writers out there will encourage you to ignore your inner critic. Do whatever you can to distract from it or suppress it altogether. Here are the problems with these strategies. One, this is avoidance and does absolutely nothing to address the issue. Two, it doesn’t work. Try telling yourself to stop thinking about something and see how long it takes until you actually stop. Your attempts to avert certain thoughts will actually result in bringing more attention to them and keep you stuck in a self-defeating loop for longer. Don’t do that to yourself. Instead, acknowledge the thought as it is. Thoughts are not facts; they are simply thoughts. Your inner critic does not reflect the reality of a situation; it’s just a perspective that lives in your head. Accept that it’s there without putting it on a pedestal and giving it too much power. Step 2: Differentiate It’s hard to tell the difference between your true inner voice and the voice of your inner critic. This step is probably the most important. It allows you to separate the parts of yourself to provide opportunities for new perspectives and healthier dialogue within you. Start by giving your inner critic a name that’s different from your own. This will help you to compartmentalize critical and fear-based thoughts under a persona separate from you. To bring awareness to the dialogue occurring in your brain, take some time to write down your thoughts. When you come across a thought that belongs to your inner critic, write it as a “you” statement instead of using “I.” For example, instead of writing “I did a horrible job in that meeting today; everyone thinks I’m an idiot,” you’ll write “You did a horrible job in that meeting today, everyone thinks you’re an idiot.” This will help you to see these thought patterns as a different persona than your true self. The more awareness you gain from writing out the thoughts floating through your mind, the easier it will be to observe the inner dialogue at the moment. Eventually, you’ll be able to imagine yourself and your inner critic as two people having a conversation, and it’s at that point that your inner critic loses a lot of its power. Step 3: Empathize and Offer Compassion When responding to your inner critic, whether you are writing or verbalizing internally, do your best to come from a place of empathy and compassion. Don’t be a bully back, even if that seems like it would help. The idea is to develop a loving relationship with yourself, one similar to the kind of relationship you may have with a friend. Remember where your inner critic came from. It’s a part of you that has been hurt in the past and has built thick walls to protect and prevent you from being hurt by anyone or anything again. Offer yourself validation, understanding, and reassurance when you hear your inner critic speak out of fear. When your critic says “you’ll never be good enough,” consider that this part of you fears judgment and often feels like a failure. Respond by saying something like “I may struggle at times, but I know I’m doing my best. I define what it means to be enough and I accept myself as I am.” This may be difficult to do in the beginning. To be honest the negative thoughts may get more intense or louder; but by practicing these steps, you’ll ensure that you are making choices and taking action based on your true perspective and not that of your inner critic. For more tips and tricks like this, stay tuned to our Bayview Therapy wellness blog. You don’t have to fall victim to your maladaptive thought patterns. You can learn to team up with all parts of yourself and overcome barriers that stand in the way of your best life. Reach out today at 954-391-5305 and let me help you untangle and weed through the thoughts that are holding you back. For more information about my services, click here.

Does your child struggle in school with reading, spelling, and sounding out words? Have you noticed your child confusing letters that look alike or sound alike? Does your child read slow or have a hard time grasping what they’ve read? Perhaps you’ve noticed your child has trouble counting, performing calculations, or remembering math facts. Or maybe your child writes slowly, has poor grammar, or has difficulty expressing their thoughts and ideas in writing. Have you wondered if your child may have a learning disorder? A learning disorder (also referred to as a learning disability) is a neurodevelopmental disorder that often becomes evident during school-age years. Early signs may appear in preschool, but become pronounced in elementary school as the learning and academic demands increase. Difficulties include problems with learning in the areas of math, reading, and/or writing. While it’s not uncommon for children to struggle somewhat while learning, children with a learning disorder often have specific difficulties which persist throughout school. In addition, children with undiagnosed learning disorders may develop a sense of inadequacy and feel as though no matter how much effort they put forth, they still can’t grasp concepts and struggle to learn. This can lead to symptoms of anxiety, depression, or behavioral problems such as acting out in school or at home. According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5), an estimated 5 to 15 percent of school-aged children are diagnosed with a Specific Learning Disorder. The following DSM-5 criteria must be met to make a diagnosis of a Specific Learning Disorder: A. Difficulties learning and using academic skills, as indicated by the presence of at least one of the following symptoms that have persisted for at least 6 months. Inaccurate or slow and effortful word reading (e.g. - reads single words aloud incorrectly or slowly and hesitantly, frequently guesses words, has difficulty sounding out words). Difficulty understanding the meaning of what is read (e.g. - may read text accurately but not understand the sequence, relationships, inferences, or deeper meanings of what is read). Difficulties with spelling (e.g. - may add, omit, or substitute vowels or consonants). Difficulties with written expression (e.g. - makes multiple grammatical or punctuation errors within sentences; employs poor paragraph organization; written expression of ideas lacks clarity). Difficulties mastering number sense, number facts, or calculation (e.g. - has a poor understanding of numbers, their magnitude, and relationships; counts on fingers to add single-digit numbers instead of recalling the math fact as peers do; gets lost in the midst of arithmetic computation and may switch procedures) Difficulties with mathematical reasoning (e.g. - has severe difficulty applying mathematical concepts, facts, or procedures to solve quantitative problems). B. The affected academic skills are substantially and quantifiably below those expected for the individual’s chronological age and cause significant interference with academic or occupational performance, or with activities of daily living, as confirmed by individually administered standardized achievement measures and comprehensive clinical assessment. For individuals aged 17 years and older, a documented history of impairing learning difficulties may be substituted for the standardized assessment. C. The learning difficulties begin during school-age years but may not become fully manifest until the demands for those affected academic skills exceed the individual’s limited capacities (e.g. - as in timed tests, reading or writing lengthy complex reports for a tight deadline, excessively heavy academic loads). D. The learning difficulties are not better accounted for by intellectual disabilities, uncorrected visual or auditory acuity, other mental or neurological disorders, psychosocial adversity, lack of proficiency in the language of academic instruction, or inadequate educational instruction. Specific Learning Disorders can be diagnosed in three academic areas: Math (also referred to as Dyscalculia), Reading (also referred to as Dyslexia), and/or Written Expression (also referred to as Dysgraphia). Some children had problems in more than one area. So how do I know if my child has a learning disorder? As many issues can interfere with learning, a comprehensive psychoeducational or psychological evaluation can help a parent better understand their child’s learning style as well as obstacles to learning. For instance, children may simply have difficulties with focus, attention, hyperactivity, or organization of their work such as Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) which can make learning a challenge. Or children may have an undiagnosed Language Disorder that affects the way they express themselves in spoken or written language, or they may struggle to comprehend spoken or written language. In addition, there may be medical explanations for why your child has difficulty. Problems with vision can make it difficult to read and often treating the vision issues through corrective lenses or perhaps vision therapy can improve reading problems. Children can have 20/20 eyesight, yet still, have impaired vision. When this may be suspected, I will refer the family for a Developmental Vision Evaluation which is designed to assess all the visual functioning required for reading, writing, and learning and is very different from a routine eye exam. Similarly, undiagnosed auditory issues can also affect learning. If a child has subtle hearing loss or hearing problems, this can definitely interfere with education. In addition, auditory processing issues can make learning and communicating a challenge. Specifically, auditory processing difficulties may lead to a child misunderstanding due to not hearing words accurately or detecting the subtle nuances in sounds. Therefore, due to the many factors involved in learning, I believe a comprehensive evaluation can identify specific problems. As part of my evaluations, I take a thorough history with the parent(s) including consulting with teachers and reviewing academic records. In terms of testing, I assess language, intellectual functioning, general academic functioning, memory and learning, attention and concentration, auditory processing, visual processing, fine motor skills, as well as emotional functioning. When specific learning concerns are present, I also conduct more rigorous testing in the academic area whether it’s math, reading, or writing. This information can be incredibly helpful to pinpoint the specific issues making learning difficult for your child. Because learning disorders are brain-based learning differences, children will need extra help and instruction that is individualized to target their needs. This may involve working with tutors who are specialized to educate children with learning differences or working with a school to put accommodations and/or an individualized education plan in place. Regardless of the needs, understanding your child’s strengths and challenges and having resulted from an evaluation can ensure you get a plan in place to ensure your child can succeed in school. If you have concerns about your child’s learning, please do not hesitate to call me at (954) 391-5305 for a complimentary consultation. For more tips on common behavioral challenges your child may be struggling with such as ADHD, click here. For more information about Dr. Heather Kuhl's approach, click here.

As the pandemic began and the orders to “shelter in place” were given, many of us had no idea our lives were going to drastically change. Many lost their jobs, worked from home, began home-schooling their children, and stopped seeing their family and friends. Many had become isolated in their homes for months and months on end. Sure, perhaps we had the weekly trip to the grocery store, but that had about summed up our interactions. Maybe for a time all you did was drive to work, return home and do it all over again the next day. This very abruptly became our “new normal” and we all adjusted the best we could. Fast forward to the stay-at-home orders being lifted, and our “normal” is changing once more. Naturally, this came with an array of emotions: some good and some bad. Ultimately, “normal” has become something very difficult for many of us in such an unprecedented time. Oftentimes, we really like to be in control. Scratch that, sometimes we need to be in control. Sometimes, if we lack control in our lives, stress and worry become unmanageable. The unknown often leads to unpleasant emotions such as anxiety and stress. Here are just a handful of things you may be thinking: “How will I readjust?” “I’ve become such an introvert and homebody, what if I don’t really want to go out anymore?” “I feel so awkward now and am so self-conscious.” “Should/will I/others be wearing a mask?” “Will this seriously affect my (insert concern: anxiety, depression, work performance, relationships, etc.)” In a time of uncertainty, knowledge is power. If what I am feeling is “real” and I am not alone, I am valid. When we are validated, we are in a much more ideal position to navigate and regulate our emotions. Have you ever heard of the “Fight or Flight” response? It is originally named for its ability to enable us to physically fight or run away when faced with danger. Adrenaline floods through the body in an attempt to prepare for battle. Only this time, the activation isn’t happening when you need it. It’s happening when you don’t want it! It’s happening in the food store, at work, among co-workers, friends, and family. And ultimately, sometimes it’s happening even when you’re alone. Activation of Sympathetic Nervous System Excess adrenaline and dopamine can lead to the following in your body: Increased heart rate Increasing breathing Sensation of dry mouth, breathlessness, or choking Tightness and/or heaviness in the chest and muscles Shaking Feeling overheated and/or lightheaded Blurry vision Butterflies and/or cramps in your stomach Nausea and/or the urge to go to the bathroom Decreased libido Inability to think clearly, rationalize and focus. The antidote to the activation of the nervous system listed above (sympathetic) is our parasympathetic nervous system. This is referred to as “rest and digest.” Deep breathing triggers this stabilization that releases feel-good neurotransmitters to help calm our nervous system. This can have immediate effects in lowering our heart rate, relaxing muscles, and thinking clearly. Here are a few tips for managing mental health when experiencing some of the above symptoms: Mindfulness: Practicing mindfulness exercises such as scanning your body from head to toe for tension in your muscles and subsequently releasing the tension, visually observing your environment, or tuning in to the noises around you. (ie: Listening to the birds sing, looking at your pets, etc.) Mindfulness allows you to become present in a non-judgmental environment. Power of the breath: Intentional breath helps us to calm down. Focusing on our breath for as little as 3-5 minutes per day can make all the difference! Journaling: Finding an outlet for anxiety allows space for the worry to leave our minds and enter the page we are writing on. Allow your thoughts to flow freely onto paper without attempting to control them. Reaching out: Help is always available. Seek professional support. Contact a co-worker, friend, or family member. If you are experiencing any of these thoughts and symptoms, you do not have to go through it alone! If you are ready to reach out and get supported in re-adjusting to the “new norm” or want support in managing anxiety, stress, and overall emotional well-being, please give me a call today. I offer FREE consultations and can be reached at 954-391-5305. I provide counseling in Coral Springs and Fort Lauderdale as well as across the state of Florida with our secure online therapy platform. For more information about me and my approach to therapy, please visit my page here. I look forward to speaking with you! For more tips on how to cope with the mental health epidemic as a result of the Covid-19 pandemic, click here.

Magnesium has been used in home remedies for a long time to treat just about everything. Ok, that’s a little bit of an exaggeration but it has been backed by science to be effective in the treatment of muscle aches and pains, issues with fatigue, migraines, anxiety, irritability, and apathy. Magnesium is a key mineral that aids in the health of our bones, nerves, and muscle functioning. It’s kind of a big deal in the body! Have you noticed that more and more people are suffering from anxiety and depression these days? Ever wonder why? Well, I certainly ponder this often and while there are several plausible explanations, one that I frequently consider is vitamin and mineral deficiencies. Magnesium is found in soil and plants; it’s an essential player in the structure of the chlorophyll molecule within plants that’s responsible for photosynthesis -- the plant’s process for producing its fuel. Over the last 50-60 years, scientists have reported a significant reduction in the amount of magnesium in our soil, fruits, and veggies, between a 25-80% decrease depending on the crop (Unknown, 2020). This is the result of industrial farming. The quality of the soil has been tampered with as well as the crops themselves to produce larger fruits and vegetables and higher yields of crops. In doing this, we are getting produce that does not have the same vitamin and mineral potency that it once had. And if that wasn’t enough, the process of refining many of the foods we eat, especially here in America, strips away pretty much all of the magnesium that’s left behind. According to the National Institutes of Health (2021), the recommended dietary allowance (RDA) of magnesium for adult males ranges from 410-420mg daily and the RDA for adult females ranges from 310-360mg daily. Pregnant females are recommended to intake between 320-400mg during pregnancy and lactation. A study in 2003 analyzed the intake of magnesium in the American diet and found that the average male was consuming 237-326mg of magnesium per day and the average non-pregnant female was consuming 177-237mg of magnesium per day (Ford, E. & Mokdad, A., 2003). Yikes!! That’s considerably lower than the RDA! With that in mind, it’s not surprising we’re experiencing problems in our bodies. We may not be giving it what it needs to function properly. The Relationship Between Magnesium Deficiency and Mental Health Let’s start by looking at how magnesium deficiency presents in the body. Some signs of low magnesium include “loss of appetite, nausea, vomiting, fatigue, weakness, tingling or numbness, muscle cramps or spasms, personality changes, and abnormal heart rhythms” (National Institutes of Health, 2021). Notice any similarities between these symptoms and those associated with anxiety and depression? As you already learned, magnesium aids in many of the processes occurring within the body, but specifically with our parasympathetic nervous system -- the system responsible for calming and relaxing us. The body uses magnesium to regulate neurotransmitters in the brain like serotonin, dopamine, and GABA that are necessary for combatting the effects of stress. Magnesium has become known as a “natural tranquilizer.” If you are a person that lives in a persistent state of stress, your body is running through its stock of magnesium at a rapid rate. When the stress response is stuck on overdrive we see a number of challenges in the body. One of which is an increase in inflammation which has been directly linked to increases in anxiety and depression. So is magnesium deficiency the primary cause of problems with mental health? Not necessarily. It’s only one of the essential nutrients we need to thrive. But is it worth considering as a potential contributor? I think so. Often we look at external factors that may be responsible for increases in anxiety and depression, but sometimes we need to look internally and learn to listen to the messages our bodies are sending us. Where To Go From Here I know it’s not fun dealing with anxiety, panic attacks, or depression. It sucks to put it lightly and can interfere tremendously with your life. But before you reach for the Xanax or Prozac, dive a little deeper into your health. What kinds of foods are you putting into your body? Are you getting proper nutrients? How frequently are you exercising? There may be other strategies to reduce certain symptoms that don’t require a pharmaceutical medication. My approach as a therapist is to treat mental health holistically. I’m not saying that there isn’t a necessary place for pharmaceutical intervention as this can be highly beneficial for some, but I think it’s imperative to consider the context of symptoms in relation to the whole person to avoid a one-size-fits-all procedure. I focus on the linkages between the mind, body, and spirit to support and achieve overall wellness. By seeking to understand the problem from different perspectives, we can implement more comprehensive interventions that allow you to live your life well. I’d love the opportunity to team up with you as you embark on your healing journey. Give me a call at 954-391-5305 for a complimentary consultation today! Resources Ford, E., & Mokdad, A. (2003, September). Dietary magnesium intake in a national sample of US adults. The Journal of nutrition. U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. (2021, March 29). Office of Dietary Supplements - Magnesium. NIH Office of Dietary Supplements. Unknown. (2020, November 12). Magnesium and Diet: Magnesium Food Sources. Ancient Minerals.

As a mom, wife, and therapist, I know the importance of self-care in order to feel good about ourselves and keep our mental health a top priority. Now that we have opened a new location in Coral Springs, Florida, I am SUPER excited to share some of my go-to locations to reconnect with myself, my husband, and my family. If you’re looking for local places to unwind and relax with your partner and/or family, I highly recommend checking out a few of these spots located in Coral Springs, Parkland, Coconut Creek, and surrounding communities. Self-Care Locations for the Busy Mom As a busy mom, I like to enjoy a few self-care locations by myself. Plus, it is important, not only for our kids to see how we take care of ourselves, but also essential in relationships to have space to really miss each other. Mia’s Cake House in Deerfield Beach – is a great place to be creative while also having a sweet treat and it’s not a far drive from Coral Springs, Fl. They offer cupcake decorating classes for those who want to learn how to take their cupcakes from bleh to WOW! I love baking and decorating, but I don’t have all the necessary tools at home, plus no matter how many cakes decorating YouTube videos or shows I watch, it doesn’t come out the same. At Mia’s Cake House in Deerfield Beach, they walk you different types of designs and you even get to take the treats home. Not only is cupcake decorating fun, but research has shown that baking can improve your mood and have significant mental health benefits. So, it is a WIN/WIN. Now, you are probably thinking “well why don’t you take your kids with you?,” well simple … I don’t like sharing my food LOL. But if you are looking for a baking camp for your kids, they have options plus online courses to do at home! For times when I want to hang out with friends, I like to go to Naked Taco in the Promenade in Coconut Creek. They have REALLY good food, a nice atmosphere, and good drinks. The staff is super friendly and it’s a nice place to have fun without having to worry about the stress of work and life. We can all use the time to not have worried! My favorite menu item is their signature chicharrones paired with a strawberry basil margarita … it is SO DELICIOUS!! Another good resource to help improve your mental health is EXERCISE! Not my favorite activity, but we all know exercise is a great way to release endorphins, reduce stress, sleep better, and feel better about yourself. While I may not LOVE the thought of exercise, the benefits of engaging in physical activity outweigh how sweaty and gross I get LOL. That being said, Coral Springs has great options for all different types of exercise. For those who love more of an open concept type gym, there are plenty of options such as Planet Fitness, LA Fitness, and YouFit gyms. I personally love taking classes. It helps to keep me accountable plus I have no clue how to properly work out, so having an instructor there is extremely helpful. Back in my youthful days (LOL) I went to American Top Team, a great facility that has recently moved to a MUCH BIGGER location in Coconut Creek. They teach different types of martial arts, I personally engaged in Muay Thai for a few years, and they even offer aftercare and camps for little kids. If you are looking to let out some stress while releasing some endorphins American Top Team is a great place to sweat. PLUS, I met a great group of people that became really good friends afterward, so it is a great place to find adult friends. Great Date Night Locations for Couples Finding a great spot to reconnect and have fun with your partner can be hard to find. Luckily there are several great spots in Coral Springs that can make date night more exciting. One of my favorite things to do with my husband is escape rooms. It allows us to have time away with the kids, go out without having to worry about building conversation (which can be hard at times) plus interact and problem solve. Red Button Escape Rooms in Coral Springs is REALLY FUN! They have several different escape room options that you can do with your partner or potentially invite a group of other couples to partake in. I would start with “Alien Invasion” if you are new to escape rooms! Now, if you are looking to be a bit more adventurous, Axe Throwing Society in Pompano Beach is another great option to do with just your partner or a group of other couples. It helps to relieve a bit of stress by exerting some physical energy. Also if you REALLY fall in love with axe throwing, you can join their official league! If Axe Throwing isn’t your jam there are also “rage rooms”. I know it sounds a bit out there but being able to break a few things (that you don’t own) helps to alleviate stress. The best location is Wreck It Fort Laudy where their slogan is “Break Sh!t, Leave Happy!” … I mean, it is a great slogan. Both Axe Throwing Society and Wreck-It Fort Laudy is a great way to release some tension and have a good time with your partner. Plus it breaks the norm of regular date nights. Family-Friendly Fun Spots Having three kids that all have to be entertained seems like an impossible feat. Oftentimes it can be. Luckily, there are some great spots in Coral Springs and Parkland that everyone in the family can enjoy. One of my son’s personal favorite spots is Monster Mini Golf. It is an indoor mini-golf location in Coral Springs where the whole course is under UV light. Now, I haven’t been able to do the laser tag or bowling yet (we get pretty wiped out with the mini-golf), but those are great options for kids of any age. Now, my daughter is more of a foodie, like her mom, and she LOVES desserts. There happen to be two great places in the area that she likes to frequent. The first is called BeLove Creamery in Coconut Creek. The desserts are INCREDIBLE, but I have to warn you that a lot of other people know that too so it is very popular and busy. …. But the wait is SO WORTH it! She also likes Cherry Smash in Coral Springs, which is also extremely close to the office. It is a nice carnival-type atmosphere so it is fun to look around, but their desserts are really good. They have GIANT sundaes, but I personally prefer a classic chocolate milkshake. Now, if I want a specialty milkshake, I would stop at BrgrStop in Coconut Creek. They have the BEST specialty milkshakes. My personal favorite is Cocoa Krispies milkshake. They also have other old-school cereal milkshakes like Fruity Pebbles, Lucky Charms, Cinnamon Toast Crunch, and Capt’n Crunch. If food was a love language it would definitely be my top preference! Prioritizing time to take care of your mental health, while also taking care of your personal relationships can be a hard task. Fortunately, in Coral Springs, Parkland, and Coconut Creek, FL there are a lot of options for you to choose from. All you have to do is make yourself a priority. That is the first step in good quality self-care. Then once you have that established you can start to integrate your romantic and family relationships into it as well. Having a good balance between all three is a great start to a good mental health routine. If you need additional help with making self-care a priority, I would be happy to help. Give me a call at 954-391-5305 for your complimentary consultation so we can discuss your needs and goals. I offer counseling in Coral Springs, Fl and Fort Lauderdale, Fl. For more information about my approach or my services, click here.